brutal. almost more mentally than physically.
this was my 3rd one, but by far the most difficult for me to finish! there was something in the last 6miles that i almost cried. it could of been the 3 hills in my view as i shuffled my way up those monsters, or it could of been the terrible aching i felt in my lower back and legs that begged me to stop the pounding. it could of been the dead silence...the pack of runners were no longer chit-chatting, we were conserving energy and hardly any crowds of people were out to cheer us on. it was lonely with myself and the "i just want to quit" thoughts...but i told them to shut up everytime it entered my mind.
i had to reach down somewhere deep to get those last miles down, no matter how slowly. by far an accomplisment, but not the one i set out for. i wanted to conquer my time from last year, instead i slayed the nasty negative mind beasts that told me i couldnt do it. screw them.
this one was local - so i had friends who held up a swedish fish stand for runner and also gave out "free high fives". my parents, sisters, nephews and BF held up the other end of town. which i am so grateful for. instead of thinking constantly of 26 miles, i would think ...only 4 more miles to BF and family. only 3 more miles to funny friends and swedish fish!!
i want to send some snaps out to my fellow runners:
the old dude who passed me and pissed me off (but inspired me to run faster...for awhile)
the guy who juggled his way through the marathon. juggling. necessary?
the "lighthouse guy". this dude made a cardboard light house and put it over himself, only enough cut out that you could see his face.
the kenyans who finished 2hours ahead of me. how in the world do they do it???
the other old man who was bragging that he was going to do 4 more marathons in the next two weeks and how he was getting up on sunday to do another one! i told him i was sitting on the couch and watching fball and then i ran away from the fool.
other side notes:
i knew the carbo-loading itlian restuarants menu better than the course map.
i could care less if i ever eat "gu" again. nasty stuff in pudding-esqe form, they made a power bar basically into a squeezable pack that you can shot into your mouth for quick energy. ew
the really cute couple in a fun neighborhood handed out bananas and i totally ate one. so needed and so appreciated.
i am not doing another marathon next year, but i am already thinking about a sprint triathalon that i could try.
are my thighs ever going to stop hurting?
Monday, October 15, 2007
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
my rant about work life
you will have to excuse me but i am feeling extraordinarily bitchy this week. part of having this blog is so i can vent and let out frustrations. this week, it is about people in my world that i have judged and been seriously annoyed with...and so far don't feel guilty.
the elevator people
the ones who face you instead of the open door and stare at you. i can feel them, i even look them in the eye as to say "i know you are looking and deciding if my outfit is good for me or bad hair day or bad choice of food - but damn can't you do this descreatly" and yet they don't see me deflecting their lock down..they just continue.
the ones who are perfectly healthy and will wait 10minutes for an elevator to show up, instead of walking up a half of flight of stairs. and for the purpose of this blog I actually counted them. there is 8 measly steps and they take the elevator.
my cube neighbor
in the land of cubes oriented offices, you can't help but hear other people on the phone b/c we dont have a door closing other people off. most of us listen but don't ask the coworker about their conversation....unless invited to.
my neighbor thinks everything i say is for her ears and that she gets to ask me all about it. it can be personal or business .... but she sees it as a free-for-all. so i don't discuss anything high profile at work. i even have a pass code with one of my good friends. if i say "stephanie and cliff are going to the cleaners" that means i have something important to say but will need to wait until after work to discuss.
she also is my personal scale. she lets me know when i have lost weight, if i have lost too much weight, what i have eaten for the day and if my pants are "too loose on me." if i am still running, working out and eating well (this is implied when i have gained weight)
she wants to know if my BF has meet my parents, if we have discussed marriage, if he wants to have kids, what is his backround story, has he been divorced, what does he do for a living, we will get engaged anytime soon, do we spend a lot of time together and my personal favorite " will we live together before we get married". my mother doesnt even ask this many questions. (*authors note* i don't gush about the BF in front of this woman. all she knows is i have a wonderful BF and "things are going well"....and these are the questions that follow that small amount of info.)
sometimes i can handle her knowing she is just trying to be nice. sometimes i want to knock her out with a slap of a saucepan on the back of her head. today i choose the latter.
everyday. every fricken day. some form of this is what i encounter. i want to TP her house.
the subway people who work at the hospital
they are mean and hate to serve people (to the workers and to the patients) all of them, even the manager. they won't look you in the eye. they seem disturbed that you order provolone instead of american cheese and actually roll their eyes when you want a combo meal. don't even ask for a cookie or you might get slapped. pricks. i now longer go there. i would rather fast for days then ever encounter their negative 'tudes again.
the general people who just look you up and down and then talk to a body part instead of looking in your eyes
maybe b/c it is one of my biggest pet peeves that it has happened to me so much this week and i have wanted to jolt them with a "what are you looking at?!!!" but i pretend i am more mature that that. i have already mentioned the cube neighbor. she looks me up and down once a day. (she is koo koo)
but a mass majority of other people i work with has done this all week...which has lead me to wear my long labcoat on ALL DAY long!! i feel like i am being visually invaded. my only defense.
yes i realize that a lot of this is my own personal bitchiness.
yes i realize i probably won't care next week about any of this. but today i needed to vent about the crazy people that are in my life by consequence, not choice.
Friday, October 5, 2007
eat pray love
no, i'm not doing that right now. it is the name of a book by Elizabeth Gilbert.
go forth now and read it!! it is just a tremendously funny, interesting and life changing book. Especially if you are a woman in your 30's used to creating your own self drama, then looking for ways to fix it .....while in the middle of eating lovely foods, praying for help and giving some lovin' here an there. i wouldn't know where to look for such a person! maybe the weirdo in the mirror at times.
the author is going to be on Oprah today, i asked the BF to tivo it for me....poor guy will have oprah amongst his listings of MLB playoffs, E Talk Soup, and other manly shows.
be sure to reveal in her travel memoirs, i can visualize myself in Itatly in Naples and eating the delicious pizza she devoured. i loves my food too.
but the best i could do was this beauty of a breafast -the picture at the top is my food in chicago with the BF and mine is the chocolate and strawberry stuffed frech toast. i still think about it everyday.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
chi chi
just got back from a lovely weekend in beautiful chicago! love that place. it feels so homey.
i say b/c i am from the mid-west (ohio) and it feels like my people.
and btw - while i am on the subject...i ask for a vote: who believes ohio is a part of the midwest and who believes ohio is still a part of the east coast? let me know what you think!
anywho weekend away with the BF and we did such things as - watch a white sox game, toured the navy pier, went to the top of sears tower and snap some photos from the top, ate churos and corndogs at the ballgame (sounds bad when i write it out), watched some sunday fball at a local pub with the locals. only one chanel had the ravens game one and my sisters were mighty pleased that the ravens went down like they did. brother-in-law not so much.
also hung out at a bakery one night to eat delicious pasteries and use the free WIFI to look up our fantasy leagues.
we did such non-scheduled things such as - went to some health fair that was at the navy pier to get free snacks ala- sams club style. we collected: 2 bottles of oraganic dressing, 2 weight watchers muffins, 4 weight watcher carmel cakes, 1 chocolate with carmel whittmans treat, 1 serving of chocolate soy milk, a green bag, kashi cereal and some tshirts for giving blood to the red cross!
well i really didn't want to, b/c like a true nurse...i don't mind sticking anyone but hate the needle in my arm. but alas, my do-gooder nice man was doing it and i couldn't whimp out now (stupid irish pride). so we gave blood.
bf red cross stats: sailed through the interview process, iron level at 17, and on/off of the needle ~13minutes. ate nutter butter, chips ahoy and water afterwards.
my red cross stats: sailed through the interview process, forgot my license at the hotel so had to give them my credit card and copy of my insurance card and that got me to getting my finger pricked....which revealed my iron was at 12.4 normal is 12 and you need a 12.5 to give blood b/c they will be taking a pint from you. so she shoved my blood in the machine again, this time 12.5.
on to the needle - i put on a brave face but said a slew of silent cuss words in my head when that gigantic 18 bore needle entered into my vein.
19 minutes later - they have to weigh my bag of blood b/c they can't keep me on the needle anylonger, my bag passes by a few ounces! the needle comes out and i can't feel my fingers from having the blood pressure cuff on my arm as a self-made tourniquet. ouch. it hurt like a mother.
i ate - nutter butters, 2 cups of orange juice and something else but i can't remember. i must of looked bad b/c everyone asked if i was ok. before i knew it someone taped a huge icebag to my arm and told me not to rub it.
i want to proudly state that i did not tell them once i was a nurse during that whole process. 1. b/c i hate it when it is done to me (esp. in the middle of sticking someone with a needle). and 2. b/c i didnt want her to get nervous and miss and really screw up my arm.
once we figured out the CTA public transport, i would say we saved around $50 in taxi fees.
great weekend. and now that i am back home i am counting down the days to the marathon. t-minus 11 more to go. boo. i don't have an ounce of enthusiasm either, more looking forward to my carbo loading days.
i say b/c i am from the mid-west (ohio) and it feels like my people.
and btw - while i am on the subject...i ask for a vote: who believes ohio is a part of the midwest and who believes ohio is still a part of the east coast? let me know what you think!
anywho weekend away with the BF and we did such things as - watch a white sox game, toured the navy pier, went to the top of sears tower and snap some photos from the top, ate churos and corndogs at the ballgame (sounds bad when i write it out), watched some sunday fball at a local pub with the locals. only one chanel had the ravens game one and my sisters were mighty pleased that the ravens went down like they did. brother-in-law not so much.
also hung out at a bakery one night to eat delicious pasteries and use the free WIFI to look up our fantasy leagues.
we did such non-scheduled things such as - went to some health fair that was at the navy pier to get free snacks ala- sams club style. we collected: 2 bottles of oraganic dressing, 2 weight watchers muffins, 4 weight watcher carmel cakes, 1 chocolate with carmel whittmans treat, 1 serving of chocolate soy milk, a green bag, kashi cereal and some tshirts for giving blood to the red cross!
well i really didn't want to, b/c like a true nurse...i don't mind sticking anyone but hate the needle in my arm. but alas, my do-gooder nice man was doing it and i couldn't whimp out now (stupid irish pride). so we gave blood.
bf red cross stats: sailed through the interview process, iron level at 17, and on/off of the needle ~13minutes. ate nutter butter, chips ahoy and water afterwards.
my red cross stats: sailed through the interview process, forgot my license at the hotel so had to give them my credit card and copy of my insurance card and that got me to getting my finger pricked....which revealed my iron was at 12.4 normal is 12 and you need a 12.5 to give blood b/c they will be taking a pint from you. so she shoved my blood in the machine again, this time 12.5.
on to the needle - i put on a brave face but said a slew of silent cuss words in my head when that gigantic 18 bore needle entered into my vein.
19 minutes later - they have to weigh my bag of blood b/c they can't keep me on the needle anylonger, my bag passes by a few ounces! the needle comes out and i can't feel my fingers from having the blood pressure cuff on my arm as a self-made tourniquet. ouch. it hurt like a mother.
i ate - nutter butters, 2 cups of orange juice and something else but i can't remember. i must of looked bad b/c everyone asked if i was ok. before i knew it someone taped a huge icebag to my arm and told me not to rub it.
i want to proudly state that i did not tell them once i was a nurse during that whole process. 1. b/c i hate it when it is done to me (esp. in the middle of sticking someone with a needle). and 2. b/c i didnt want her to get nervous and miss and really screw up my arm.
once we figured out the CTA public transport, i would say we saved around $50 in taxi fees.
great weekend. and now that i am back home i am counting down the days to the marathon. t-minus 11 more to go. boo. i don't have an ounce of enthusiasm either, more looking forward to my carbo loading days.
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